Commuterrant

What the Pug Thinks of the Mom

The day that Stepdaughter the Younger came up with her artistic rendering of Hazel the Pug, she and I were spending quality time drawing together. I drew a few pictures of Hazel myself, and this is how Hazel responded:

She picked up her bone, came over to me and flopped her head down on the sketchbook, looking devastated. Was she trying to tell me something?

What the Kid Thinks of the Pug

I just dug this picture out of a pile of papers. What does Stepdaughter the Younger think of when she thinks of Hazel the Pug? Playing? Yummy dog kisses? Cuteness?

No. She thinks of Hazel scratching her butt on the rug.

   

When Contextual Ads Go Horribly Awry, Part 2

There's a God-awful smell of fecundity and rot permeating the basement, and it grows more noxious with each passing day. I called a plumber, and they graciously declined to come out and charge us for a visit, telling me that more often than not, these situations result from a decomposing dead animal stuck in the wall.

So, what to do when there's a dead, rotting animal stuck in the wall? I did what I usually do when in a perilous situation. I Googled. I Googled the phrase "dead animal in wall," and alongside links to helpful homeowner web forums and message boards, I saw the following ads:

I give you: "Dead Animals. Whatever you're looking for you can get it on eBay." Has eBay purchased every possible search phrase on Google? I wanted to Google "Decapitated Human Head," to see if an eBay ad promising to fulfill my e-commerce dreams would pop up, but I'm trying to avoid a visit from the Department of Homeland Security. And I have no comment regarding the "See Dead Animals" link, which I did NOT click on. "See Dead Animals. Big, dead animals. Fun to watch." Note the use of boldface type, judiciously reserved for the word "dead." Oops; I just commented.

See other Google goodness, including When Contextual Ads Go Horribly Awry, Part 1.